| | 4:04 PM - How I spent game day, or, GO DAWGS!!! This morning I awoke at the ungodly hour of 7:39 AM, feeling somewhat lively and moderately refreshed. I had fallen asleep around 1 and, for one of the only times in the last few months, didn't wake up again at any point during the night. No text messages, no phone calls, no parties next door to bug me, etc., etc. This is not to say that I am bothered by the fact that my sleep schedule is usually very, um, nontraditional. It's just of interest--to me, at the very least--that I slept somewhat normally.
Of course I didn't stay awake. I thought to myself, "Wow, self. You could get out of bed, walk to Big City Bread, get a biscuit and coffee, and read your book. Or you could just take a long walk. Or you could just get up and see how the other half lives, the half that wakes up around this time instead of going to bed at this time." But instead, ol' Self fell back asleep to a not-so-pleasant treat of restless dreams. The dreams were thinly masked messages or representations of already-present fears and situations, though, so perhaps they were useful: they, in fact, reminded me that I needed to call back my sister. That I had to be a little more proactive on the money-making front. That, of all things, I had to do the dishes (ick).
Unfortunately, the dream that most stuck was, not surprisingly, the one I had right as I was waking up again around 11 AM: my sister's ex, recently diagnosed with terminal cancer (in the DREAM, folks!!), was wandering around a big country house and merely glanced at me before turning and walking away. It was, perhaps, one of the saddest moments I've encountered in a dream of late: seeing someone I love very much but can't find it in my heart to forgive, someone who was a part of my family who, at least in this dream world, had very little time left to live but couldn't find the words to even greet me, nor I her.
The feeling I was left with is one I've not been able to completely shake all day. Luckily, other emotions have taken over, for the most part. I finished one really wonderful book last night, Anna Quindlen's newest novel (as purchased for me by Liz Lawson): _Rise & Shine_ comes highly recommended. Now I'm reading Adam Langer's _Crossing California_. Only fifty pages in but am already quite pleased.
Onto some letter writing and locust-listening. I've been blasting my newest emusic.com purchases (bought another album by The National!) and only just realized that the outdoor sounds are much more fitting to my mood.
Goodbye for now. Go Dawgs. I shall continue avoiding the downtown area until the red & black parade clears out. If that makes me a bad dawg (grosssss--cue a groan from Liz & giggle from J. Hart, if all goes well), then so be it. 1 Comment |
No comments:
Post a Comment